


The Lettuce Kid

by PanicAtTheKeyboard



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Alive Allison Argent, Bottom Stiles Stilinski, Confused Scott, Derek is Derek, Derek is Good with Kids, Derek is a Tease, Dom/sub Undertones, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Jealous Derek, Light BDSM, M/M, Marking, Multi, Not Beta Read, Pining Derek, Pining Stiles Stilinski, Protective Derek, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski Friendship, Scott is a Good Friend, Secret Crush, Secret Relationship, Sheriff Stilinski Finds Out, Sheriff Stilinski is a Good Parent, Sheriff Stilinski's Name is John, Stiles Stilinski is a Little Shit, Stiles Stilinski is a Tease, Top Derek Hale, Top Derek Hale/Bottom Stiles Stilinski, Underage Masturbation, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-16 08:54:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13632951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanicAtTheKeyboard/pseuds/PanicAtTheKeyboard
Summary: (AU, No Werewolves)Derek is Scott's 'guardian'. Stiles and Scott become friends after a pun-filled lab in Mr. Harrison's class. When Stiles is invited to hang out with Scott at his house he never expected to find a hunk of meat like Derek to be there. Derek doesn't know what he has gotten himself into as Scott brings home the kid he heard about that made a lettuce pun. Welp, he's gonna have to turnip his game to beet stiles.





	1. Idiots Meet Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two idiots become friends.

CHAPTER 1

Stiles cringed as he saw Mr. Harrison’s lips forming the words “find a partner”. Stiles is a lanky, pale, freckled, big-mouthed, sarcastic idiot. Who in their right mind would ever be his lab partner?

“Wanna be partners?” A boy with tanned skin and a crooked jaw stared at him expectantly. 

Of course, another idiot.

Stiles glanced at the boy’s puppy eyes and sighed. “Sure, dude! I’m Stiles.” Stiles gave a small grin in an attempt to look somewhat hopeful they could pass this lab. 

The boy looked confused at Stiles’ fake enthusiasm but then shrugged and replied. “I’m Scott.” He sat on the stool next to Stiles and fiddled with some of the lab tools displayed.

Mr. Harrison babbled on about how the lab will work, what it will teach them, and went over the instructions, giving pointed looks towards Stiles’ table. He finally allowed everyone to get to work looking at a piece of lettuce under a microscope. Apparently, they had to draw and label the part of the lettuce they saw under the lens. Stiles rolled his eyes and looked at the microscope and back to the sheet of paper that lye in front of him, he was gonna draw the shit outta that lettuce and its cell walls. 

Scott seemed to take the end of Mr. Harrison’s lecture as a cue to talk to Stiles. “So, Stiles… uh.” He drifted off, not knowing what to talk about. Scott’s eyes flitted down to where Stiles was scribbling down his full name. “Hey! Your dad’s the sheriff, right?” His eyes widened and he smiled as if he were proud of himself for recognizing the last name. 

Stiles felt the corners of his mouth lift upward at the mention of his dad. “Yeah. For an old man, he can kick ass.” He abandoned his paper and turned towards Scott, encouraging him to keep the conversation flowing. 

Scott chuckled, “He’s not that old! But he can definitely lay down the law.” Scott laughed at his own joke then paused, thinking, and continued, “My dad actually isn’t old at all. I mean Derek’s not really my dad. I mean he is but not my dad-dad, y’know?” Scott leaned onto the table, still facing Stiles.

“Um, not really. Care to elaborate?” Stiles thought it was nice how Scott seemed to talk about his father in a positive light and decided he wouldn’t mind knowing more. 

Scott glanced back at Mr. Harrison, who was scolding a pair of students in the front of the room, then to Stiles before continuing, “Well, my mom got with some dude when she was really young, had me, then met Derek. They were all chill together and got married but then divorced after a few years and like three years go by and my mom passed away, so I’ve been hanging with Derek, my ‘dad’.” Scott broke eye contact with Stiles as he said the last part. 

Stiles looked at Scott and this time he thought about how they could be friends. Stiles was desperately low on friends and he doesn’t think Danny appreciates his jokes as much as he lets on. “I get it. My mom passed away, too. So its just been me and my old kickass dad. But, Derek sounds like a pretty standup guy, so there’s that.” 

Scott perked up and let out a breath as he smiled at Stiles. “You’re awesome dude. But, yeah, Derek’s pretty cool and all but he’s all prickly and emotionally constipated.” 

Stiles burst out into laughter at Scott’s unexpected words. Scott started laughing with him and it was a beautiful moment.  
This, of course, caught Mr. Harrison’s attention. “Stiles! Scott! What could possibly be so funny about plant cells? Get back to work before I give you both detention.”

Stiles rolled his eyes as he calmed down from laughter. He was sure his face was flushed and he looked insane but glancing over at Scott with his flailing hands and smiling face, he felt like maybe he wasn’t the only insane one. Scott calmed down enough to turn to Stiles with his lips still upturned as the ghost of laughter lingered. 

Stiles leaned towards Scott, with the most serious face and murmured, “Yes, lettuce continue Scott.” 

Stiles sat back, bubbling with laughter, as Scott picked up the lettuce from under the microscope and threw it at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anyone have any ship/otp they would want me to write about, or a plot? Comment! (Especially, if I ship it too, it will happen!)


	2. Betrayal of Scott

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles' first encounter with Derek.

CHAPTER 2 

The next day, Scott was the one to approach Stiles at the end of class. “Hey, Stiles! Thank goodness Harrison is our last period because his class would ruin my whole day.” 

Stiles, let out a small laugh as he packed his bag and swung it over his shoulder. “Yeah.” Stiles thought about yesterday and how boring it would be to go home and do homework, specifically procrastinating homework. “Um, did you wanna like, hang out sometime, see a movie or get dinner?” Stiles cringed as he sounded like it was a date. “ Like to be friends.” Stiles tried to correct himself, “Better friends, I mean, because you're not necessarily my type. Not that you're not attractive.” Stiles didn’t know what his hands were doing as he flailed. “Oh god, I just mean I like more of um, hunky men?” Stiles facepalmed. He quickly kept babbling on until Scott interrupted him. 

“Yeah, you can come over now? If you want.” Scott offered and used his hands to gesture that Stiles should shut up now. Stiles breathed a little easier realizing he just gave away that he’s gay and Scott didn’t even blink. That’s when he made his decision. 

“Yup, I can come over now. Let me just text my dad to heat up the leftovers in the fridge.” Stiles pulled out his phone, texting a brief message about the situation and explaining that he doesn’t really know when he’ll be home. 

“Ok dude I ride the bus so we should probably get going unless you want me to have an asthma attack running after it.” Scott gestured for Stiles to follow him as he started for the bus loop. 

Stiles grabbed Scott's shoulder, effectively stopping and turning him slightly. “Actually,” Stiles dug into his jacket pocket and pulled out his keys, “your newly self-titled best friend has a super-cool, super-awesome jeep. So no hurrying and no bus for us.”

Scott looked at the doors at the other end of the hallway, “Thank god because I think the bus might have already left.” Scott started walking toward the hallway doors leading to the parking lot. 

Stiles followed him and they emerged into the groups of the last students trickling out of school. Scott stopped and let stiles lead him to the rickety, blue jeep. Stiles, who never bothered to lock his jeep, because, let's be real, who would steal his car with Jackson’s Porsche sitting right next to it, opened the creaking door for Scott and continued to his side. He opened his door and settled into his jeep, throwing his backpack in the back seat, starting the ignition. Scott put his bag with Stiles’ and shut his door, hurriedly putting on his seat belt which caused Stiles to give him a ‘look’. 

Stiles groaned, “Dude, I'm not that bad of a driver. Plus, don’t judge my baby,” he stroked the dash suggestively then slipped on his seatbelt. He started backing out as Scott muttered out witty comments about driving. 

Scott gave directions to Stiles as Stiles did his best to follow them. With their teamwork, they finally made it to Scott’s house. 

Stiles laughed as he slid out of the jeep and grabbed his bag, Scott doing the same.

Scott led Stiles to the door and he pushed it open, obviously knowing it was unlocked. They stepped through the door when Scott turned to Stiles. 

“You can just kinda drop your stuff by the door ‘cause we are probably just gonna play video games. Unless you actually want to do homework?” Scott looked at him with squinted eyes. 

Stiles laughed loudly and opened his mouth to reply but was interrupted by a different voice. 

“Scott? You home?” A tall man packed with muscle and who had some dark stubble, turned the corner, answering his own question as he saw the boys and Stiles swore he saw a breeze go through the man’s dark locks making him look like a god.

“No, obviously I’m not home, Derek.” Scott’s sarcasm brought Stiles back to where he was and he was momentarily proud of the sassy comeback but then his brain registered the name. That is Scotts ‘dad but not dad-dad’. 

What the fuckity fuck. 

Derek huffed a small laugh and turned to Stiles, his eyebrows going up a little bit as his gaze moved up and down stiles. Stiles felt himself become a tomato.

Scott spoke up, “This is stiles, he’s my new friend with even worse jokes than you.” 

Stiles still had the mind to look mildly offended at that. But then Derek broke out in a large smile and Stiles’ mind melted. “So this is the lettuce kid.” Stiles felt his mouth open as he turned to Scott. This was mortifying and he thought his puns should never be heard by people as attractive as Derek, especially the lettuce one. He hoped his face conveyed the betrayal he felt. 

Scott only laughed as he saw Stiles’ flushed face and decided to have some mercy on him. “Derek.” Derek’s steady, intent look finally lifted off of Stiles and turned to Scott. “We are gonna go up to my room.” Without waiting for a reply Scott started towards the stairs. By the time Stiles registered he should follow him Scott was halfway to the next floor. 

Stiles glanced at Derek and squeaked out a quick, “Bye” and took to the stairs as ungracefully as possible. He willed himself not to look back, even as he felt a heated gaze on his ass. And if he swayed his hips and slowed down his pace on the stairs, as he thanked himself for wearing nicer, form-fitting jeans today, then it was only because he heard a small, sharp inhale from where Derek had been standing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaahhhhhhhhh thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think of it so far and thank you so much for reading! The chapters will be getting longer so don't worry!


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